Right off of Rt. 95 in downtown Philadelphia is the world's largest and most prestigious cloud factory. As you are passing the Cottman Avenue exit, look to your left (if you are heading south), you will see a giant, neon sign which reads "Frank's Clouds, Inc.", you can't miss it. They are the world's supplier of stratocumulus, cumulus congestus, altostratus undulatus and even cumulonimbus with mammatus. No matter your cloud necessities, Frank's expert cloud-techs will work directly with you to provide the clouds you need to your exact specifications. All on time and under budget.
And hey, be sure to tell 'em Yummy Hut sent you.
This was a paid advertisement for Frank's Clouds, Inc. Philadelphia, PA
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Friday, August 8, 2008
Thursday, August 7, 2008
No Use Crying Over Spilled Blue Paint
One glorious, sunny morning as singing birds gathered outside of my window, I went into the kitchen for a glass of water. Carelessly, I swung open the cabinet door whacking myself in the forehead; the impact sent me reeling backwards through the open basement door and down the steps with a repeated thud. I landed underneath a shelf which had been loosened by my fall overturning an entire bucket of blue latex paint which was now steadily flowing on top of my head. After a moment, I stood up feeling dizzy; everything was a swirl of blurry blue. Without realizing, I reached out towards my wood burning stove (I thought it was a support beam) trying to brace myself. Scream. Pain. Smell of flesh burning. Instantly I ran towards the sink for some cool water relief, but instead stepped on a poorly placed rake which slapped me in the face upon its swift upright positioning. Stumbling out of the back basement door, I bumped my knee on a circular saw as I made my way into the backyard; which incidentally is a field of cacti. Predictably, within moments, I had cactus pricks all over my body. That's when I noticed that at some point I had managed to get a glass jar stuck on my left hand. Pain was all I knew as I blindly tripped over a tricycle into a murky, alligator infested swamp. I sat up, wiped the mud from my face, clearing my vision just in time to see the alligator with its open jaw. Somehow my shirt was on fire. All in all, it was still the best day I had had all week.
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Yummy Hut Guest Writer: Vladimir Nabokov
One of the greatest writers of the past century; Yummy Hut presents Mr. Vladimir Nabokov.
YUMMY HUT by Vladimir Nabokov
YUMMY HUT by Vladimir Nabokov
Yummy Hut, light of my life, fire of my mind. My blog, my soul. Yum-ee-hut: the tip of the tongue taking a trip three steps down the palate to tap, at three, on the teeth. Yum. Ee. Hut. Did Yummy Hut have a precursor? It did, indeed it did. In point of fact, there might have been no Yummy Hut at all had I not loved, one summer, a certain initial blog-site. In a princedom by the sea. Oh when? About as many years before Yummy Hut was started as my age was that summer. You can always count on a murderer for a fancy prose style.
Thanks Vlad!
Friday, July 25, 2008
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Yummy Hut Guest Writer: Dr. Seuss
Yummy Hut is proud to finally present the first installment of our "Guest Writer Series". We are honored to have Dr. Seuss as our first contributor.
BALLOON RACE by Dr. Seuss
Catching balloons to fly through the air.
Red ones, blue ones, green ones and yellow.
"Nice work!" says Mayor Gumbunch, a round, jolly fellow.
A Funwazzle has three balloons, as he starts to fly.
A Blandoodle with four, begins to glide very high.
The sky is soon filled with flyers galore.
Blandoodles and Funwazzles gracefully soar.
Town folk cheer; they cheer and they cheer.
The flyers are specks that soon disappear.
Friday, June 27, 2008
Friday Haiku VIII
~I LIKE SEARS~
Three-spoke quill handle
An extra-large head casting
My Craftsman drill press
Friday, June 20, 2008
Friday Haiku VII
~TECHNOLOGY, SOMETIMES NOT SO COOPERATIVE~
Laptop malfunction
I press the keys; tap, tap, tap
Nothing happens; tap
Laptop malfunction
I press the keys; tap, tap, tap
Nothing happens; tap
Friday, May 23, 2008
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Global Warming... Hurry Up!
My name is Bog, I have been frozen inside this wall of ice for over 40,000 years and I love bananas. It all began one Upper Paleolithic spring morning, I departed from my rocky dwelling to hunt mammoth but lost my way amongst the trees that always seemed so familiar. For days I tried retracing my steps for a way home, only to find nothing in the form of help or direction. It was on the seventh day that I met the shining man. His body was a glimmering silver color, his head covered by a sort of shield. At first, he simply stood still in the middle of the forest as I watched him from afar. When he noticed me staring, he beckoned me to come towards him. As I approached, he handed me a yellow object and gestured for me to eat it. "It's a banana", the shining man said. I took a bite, it was splendid! I gestured back to him to give me more. "Peel it this time", he said while showing me how to remove the outer, protective layer. This made the banana taste even better! My elation at this discovery made the shining man smile. "For you", he said pointing to the entire banana pile. I eagerly grabbed another, then another. When I turned around, the shining man had vanished without a trace. For years I stood there, eating the bananas oblivious to the changing climate that was transforming the world around me. Then it happened, my freezing fingers could no longer peel bananas. To this day I stand here frozen, holding a delicious banana as I wait for a thaw so I may taste the sweet mush once more.
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